ouch!

Just a little humor…
(Yeah…VERY little?)

*- To be clear, the “meth”, the “escort”, and the hypocrisy of the act itself are the problem, not the actual “butt love” or the “male”.

I say this- but will deny it, despite having been dragged to a handful of his live Crusades at Cleveland’s Municipal Stadium, despite being on his mailing list for the last decade courtesy of my lunatic aunt, despite the fact that his parenting skills failed to keep his idiot son, Franklin from crawling up W.’s ass, and, of course, despite the fact that his “belief system” belongs in the DSM-IV.

1)When the cult member is outside of the sphere of cult influence, he/she must constantly hum cult-approved soundtrack music- (ed. note: “Rock of Ages” works well so long as it is not the co-opted Def Leppard version, which is expressly forbidden except for the unidexter) loud enough inside the head to drown out potential reality’s persecution of the cult.

2) In those members whom the seed is but newly planted, earbuds will be supplied to provide constant communication with The Leader(ed. note: The member will disregard static-riddled shouts out for commercial beaver and/or massages from male escorts as there is at least a one in three chance that these are merely the intercepted ranting of long haul truckers on the CB radio and not The Leader’s personal phone calls).

3) Rather than risk reality contamination, it may become necessary relieve members of their untrustworthy eyes and virgin ears. Members need not fear such a procedure as it will be conducted by professionals highly-trained in the field of Intelligent Healing, rather than the abomination that is secular medical science.

4) Gallaudet is off-limits to de-eyed, and de-eared members.

Or maybe he was trying to make this person enter the school with an uppity, elitist attitude.

Or maybe both.