Be Afraid, Pastafarians; Be Very Afraid…
7 June 2007 by Eve
If this were happening in the US, some ambitious young lawyer out to make a name for herself might be able to argue it as a clear case of violation of freedom of religion:
Council bans boy, 6, from flying Jolly Roger at pirate party – because it is ‘unneighbourly’
by DAVID WILKES – More by this author »Last updated at 19:35pm on 5th June 2007
Comments (71)
As his sixth birthday approached, Morgan Smith’s parents thought hoisting the Jolly Roger would be the perfect way to make the pirate-mad youngster’s day.
The flag was duly run up the pole in the back garden, leaving Morgan looking forward to a party on Saturday with lots of friends wearing eyepatches and wielding toy cutlasses.
But little did the family know that out on the treacherous high seas of bureaucracy, trouble was heading their way.
Council officials branded the skull and crossbones flag “unneighbourly” and banned Morgan’s parents Richard and Sharon from flying it.
The couple must apply for planning permission at a cost of £75, and then an assessment of the 5ft by 4ft flag’s “impact” on the surrounding area of Stone, Staffordshire, will be undertaken.
[snip]
For years, the patriotic family have flown a Union Jack or a St George’s flag on the 18ft-high flagstaff at their detached home without a problem, but a neighbour complained to the council about the Jolly Roger.
Mr Smith said: “When the lady from the council came to see me she said that it was no problem flying any of the other flags, it was the Jolly Roger that was of concern.
[snip]
Mrs Smith, 43, said: “It strikes me as very petty. Who would complain about it? Obviously someone with too much time on their hands.”
Councillor Richard Stevens said the council had objected to the flag because “it was unneighbourly and could open the doors for all kinds of flags”.
Folks, we never thought this day would come, but all new religions go through their periods of oppression and persecution. We must not falter in our devotion to the freebooter philosophy; we cannot allow the giant machinery of established dogma to crush our fledgling faith!
For yea, though we be forced to cower in cobwebby catacombs wearing Ye Olde Holy Eyepatch and sipping the saintly spirit of grog, we shall keep our piratical pride. For lo, though we dine alone on the sacred spaghetti in the darkest corners of our besieged homes, we shall hold our headscarfed-and-tricorn-hatted heads high.
We shall fight on the Internet, in the blogs and by the watercoolers! And we shall never surrender!
ALL HAIL THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER! Ramen, and may His Noodly Appendage touch you.
(via Pharyngula)
7 June 2007, on 8:02 pm
Seriously, though; what’s “unneighbourly” about flying a Jolly Roger for a kid’s birthday party?!
7 June 2007, on 8:50 pm
Aye, Cap’n Eve, the Jolly Roger is a luvly rag!
Yon scurvy bitch (I’ll assume) must walk the plank! Aargh, matey, ’tis time we took matters into our own hands and keel-hauled the auld bitch. Or give her a taste of the lash, for being a vinegry old biddie…
Poor laddie, to have his jolly birthday party ruined by a spoilsport “with too much time on her hands”! Aargh!
7 June 2007, on 9:18 pm
That is one neighbourhood that won’t be touched by His Noodly Appendage.
7 June 2007, on 9:41 pm
Much like that more faddish and popular religion, pastafarianism seems to have claimed some of its icons from earlier religions.
Did you know that the skull and crossbones was actually the marine flag of the Knights Templar? Or that some masonic rituals echo the skull and crossbones image?
Back to your plates of steaming spaghetti and meatballs.
Oh, Ollie: the flying spaghetti monster gave the grumpy neighbors heapin’ helpin’s of freewill. Sadly they chose to use their ration to be asshats.
7 June 2007, on 10:03 pm
Thar’s mutiny all ’round, First Mate Naomi, I tell ye; mutiny all ’round! We free ladies and gentlemen o’ the sea must needs fight for our right to party – an’ to hoist Ye Olde Black-and-Bones!
7 June 2007, on 10:14 pm
Looks like I will have to ake my pirate flag down which is hanging above my garage.
8 June 2007, on 12:21 am
This be totally ridiculous. `Tis a kid`s party fer cryin’ ou’ loud. All this cryin’ about a shipmate jolly roger fer a party when thar be so many real problems in th’ world t’ protest about. How borin’ be swabbies`s lives that they be havin’ t’ create this sort o’ drama ‘ere th’ only result would be takin’ th’ joy away from a wee boy who merely wants a shipmate party fer his birthday. Heartless idiots!
8 June 2007, on 4:31 am
Aye, Bos’n Star, aye…
8 June 2007, on 5:34 am
Thar be a neighbour who’s wantin’ a good keelhaulin’, if ye know whats I mean. Which act is honestly more unneighbourly, I ask? Flyin’ the Jolly Roger, or ruinin’ a tot’s party?
Hoist it up high, I says!
8 June 2007, on 10:34 am
Yeearrghhh, ’tis mutiny say I!
8 June 2007, on 12:25 pm
You people with your Flying Spaghetti Monster. The great Cthulhu will eat you alive when the stars align!
8 June 2007, on 2:11 pm
“Harr…!”
8 June 2007, on 4:37 pm
Michael, me boy, I’ve oft noted that Ye Olde Flyin’ Spaghetti Monster and Ye Greate Cthulhu is a-resemblin’ each other rather closely. Mayhap their mateys be, rather than “People of the Book,” People of the Plate – of Pasta, that is!
Shiver me timbers…
8 June 2007, on 7:27 pm
if its it “your” property why can’t you do what you want with it?
We should go at night and replace every “acceptable” flag with the jolly roger, or something more offensive, like the sigil baphomet!