A new GifS Feature – <b>Lion Feed</b> – This Week:
4 March 2006 by Sean
In the spirit of our posts about atheist rights and becoming more active in defending ourselves against growing theocracy, little Hal the dipshit Xian from Northwestern University has inspired me to start a new weekly feature, welcoming all GifSters to participate. Hal is one of those self-righteous Xian punks who thinks because he knows a few things about the world he can spout on about the nonexistent liberal media, the evil black-helicopter UN, and a load of other right-wing Xian delusions. He’s also one of these idiots who still believes that the world is filled with people being persecuted for their fanatical religious beliefs, rather than the exact opposite — those of us who are moderates or secularists suffering in a world of increasing religious mania.
That said, here’s the weekly mission of Lion Feed: pick an idiot’s blog, read its idiot posts, comment on it and tear it a new asshole. That simple. Each new asshole that gets torn provides more blood for the lions to feed on. I (and any others who wish to participate) plan to post a new piece of Purina Lion Chow at the end/beginning of each week.
Feel free to send me suggestions for new victims to feed to the lions!
And don’t worry, just because this week’s Lion Feed is a Christian, doesn’t mean he/she/it always has to be.
Herewith, baby chickenhead Hal’s arrogant/ignorant little blog.
Have at it, gang. Onward Atheist Soldiers.
I will be checking in throughout the week and heaping my own abuse.
PS: In the spirit of democratic due process, the victim of each week’s Lion Feed should have the right to come on the board and say “No, you have me wrong, I’m not a (fill in the blank): bigot, reactionary, fanatic, delusionist.” In which case we can either mock him/her/it even more — or let them off with a cat scratch. By 2005, ringtone kevin lose control s generated more than $2 billion in annual worldwide revenues. The MSL also ensures that make ringtone into mp3 Provider gets payment for the phone that was purchased or “leased”. 6 SMS sent per day per person across ringtones cingular ringtones cingular subscriber base. Some facilities install signal-jamming equipment to prevent their use, although in many countries, including mosquito ringtone such equipment is illegal. Mobile phone use on aircraft is also prohibited and many airlines claim in their in-plane announcements that this prohibition is due to possible interference with aircraft radio communications. Since boston loan car of boston loan car s, concerns have been raised about the potential health impacts from regular use. Qantas, the Australian airline, is the first airline to run houston car and loans texas aeroplane in this configuration in the autumn of 2007. There are more than 500 million used loans title in car chicagoland s in loans title in car chicagoland sitting on shelves or in landfills[3], and it is estimated that over 125 million will be discarded this year alone. The Finnish government decided in 2005 that union by cash western loans way to warn citizens of disasters was the union by cash western loans network. ) and upload directly to their mobile phone with no limit on card that casino credit loan accept of songs uploaded.
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4 March 2006, on 6:19 pm
im on it.
5 March 2006, on 12:06 am
Right on, bbbb. Thanks for playing along.
Herewith, the beginning salvo against this week’s Lion Feed™: Halbert’s Cubicle.
Oh, gawd. A Dilbert reference right off the bat. How geek-boy pathetic can you get?
For this first frontal assault, I will just randomly peruse ignat Hal’s blog and find stupid shit to laugh at. Snippets in italics represent direct quotes from ignat Hal.
Thank God for the internet, the last bastion of unadulterated free speech left in this world. Well, that is unless the UN and so many of its member states get their grubby hands on it.
The UN is a threat to the Internets? Wow. This is news to me. Hey, Hal, is John Bolton your secret lover?
In 2009, George W. Bush for Secretary-General of the UN.
Right, Hal. Because GW is such a beloved figure all around the world, as his travels just this past week prove.
Actually, no other world leader has sparked so many protests worldwide in the history of the planet. No one. See Feb. 15/16, 2003.
You’d have to be a fucking idiot to think this man should lead the U.N. — or that such a thing would ever be allowed to happen.
As far as history goes, I’m certainly not against offering students lessons in African history (in high school they ought to be optional). But I have a problem with any world history course. Considering how poorly some people understand American history, why is there such a fuss to add in other histories? Can we agree that people should understand their own history before worrying about international historie
Oh, man. A fucking jingoist idiot who thinks American history is more important than all others. Actually, Hal, there is this thing called the planet earth, filled with many nations, and they all interact. There are NO histories that don’t include the histories of other nations. Where the fuck did you get the idea that there where? And as Mark Twain said: “Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.”
This one I can’t even quote… You just have to see the whole repressed rant for itself. Apparently this was one of Hal’s school papers:
The case for eliminating pornography
… In which Hal claims, based on twisted logic, that pornography is not protected free speech.
Okay, as far as I can tell, Hal is a college student. A college student against pornography? What kind of sick, twisted fuck must he be? Does he sleep with his hands folded over his abdomen like a Calvinist so he doesn’t accidentally touch his mid-morning woody and go straight to hell?
Hal, you’re pathetic.
And — oh man… Here’s a snippet from his review of a book called The Lost Message of Jesus. Sorry it’s so long, but I just had to include it all to show what sick, self-hating Xian freaks people like Hal can be. Never do they wonder why gawd kills innocent people every day — women, children, everyone, in big mud slides. Instead, in their childish minds, there is some sort of cosmic justice at play. Check out this primitive shit:
Unfortunately, the book takes a major left turn and advocates a nice, warm, fuzzy version of Christianity, sometimes referred to as the Moral Influence theory of atonement. The authors essentially write that Evangelical notions of hell, sin, punishment, atonement, etc. are all perversions of the Biblical message. Jesus didn’t die on the cross in our place for the punishment of sin. He died on the cross to show us what true devotion to God is like and the cross, as the authors put it:
“the cross is a symbol of love. It is a demonstration of just how far God as Father and Jesus as his Son are prepared to go to prove that love. The cross is a vivid statement of the powerlessness of love.”
Yeah. The authors talk several times about the “myth of redemptive violence,” saying that “God is love” becomes a lie if Jesus died for us to accept our sins.
This picture they present of Biblical “redemption” is flawed. They can’t adequately account for sin. Though Mohler never really says whether or not the authors completely discount sin, it doesn’t matter. If God doesn’t punish sin, then it doesn’t matter what we do. If God is just “pure love” as they would like to think, then why should we bother changing for Him? He’d like us just the same no matter what.
But such an unbalanced view of the attributes of God cannot be reconciled with the Biblical text. We know that God is love, but we also know that he is just. Over and over in the text it says that God will punish sin. If God will punish sin, and mankind is sinful, then the only consequence is that God must punish mankind. But thankfully, because of His love, God came to Earth in the the person of Christ and received the punishment due our sins. By his atoning sacrifice, mankind could enter into the presence of God unblemished.
Jeebus H. Cripes. Sick, huh?
5 March 2006, on 1:14 am
“Jesus didn’t die on the cross in our place for the punishment of sin. He died on the cross to show us what true devotion to God is like and the cross, as the authors put it
But thankfully, because of His love, God came to Earth in the the person of Christ and received the punishment due our sins.
Hal’s profile I’m a doctoral chemistry student at Northwestern University, writing about campus life, politics, religion, and more.
I am laughing so hard I can’t breath!
5 March 2006, on 2:37 am
Stardust I thought I gave myself a whiplash when I read that Doctoral part. I had to check it twice just to make sure I was reading it properly. That Hal is just plain soft brained, bring out the milk and cookies.
JIM
5 March 2006, on 8:38 am
To be fair, he is articulate and doesn’t completely betray himself as a jellyhead at first glance, but then when you read his shit about “entering into the presence of gawd unblemished” you are left stupefied. What the fuck are these Xians smoking? And why do they hate themselves so much? Fuckin’ walkin’ around fairly bursting at the seems with “sin”. It’s sad.
5 March 2006, on 9:39 am
Did you see the whining about the bomb setoff near a xian bookstore in Palestine? Damn xians are over there trying to convert (meaning destroy the culture and identity) the Palestinians, funded by right-wing nut jobs who are vocal supporters of the Israeli occupation government and they get all upset because someone wants them to leave? What do you suppose those nut jobs would do if a militant pro-Al-Queda Islamic group open a bookstore in Dallas or Wichita? How is that different?
Hal may know chemistry, but when it comes to politics he flunked first grade.
5 March 2006, on 12:02 pm
Charley: And you know why they are funded by right-wing American Xian nutjobs? Because of that uniquely American take on Xianity that includes the concept of The Rapture, ya? They see the Middle East as the place where their fairy tale stories will all come true. Fuckin’ whackjobs.
5 March 2006, on 1:44 pm
Just went to ol’ Hal’s blog and dropped him a comment. That guy is your typical religious, brainwashed freak.
Speaking of brainwashed, did you guys read the Scientology piece in Rolling Stone? It’s quite good. Check it out here.
5 March 2006, on 1:52 pm
Thanks, Mike. In the interest of feeding The Lion (who is always hungry, especially for Xians), can you share what you said?
Thanks for the Scientology link. I found this part fucking disturbing. Never knew this:
To attack his enemies, Hubbard issued a policy known as “Fair Game,” which maintained that all who opposed Scientology could be “tricked, sued or lied to and destroyed.” This policy was enforced by Scientology’s quasisecret police force, known as the Guardian’s Office. By the 1970s, among its tasks was “Operation Snow White,” a series of covert activities that included bugging the Justice Department and stealing documents from the IRS. (Scientology officials say Fair Game was canceled decades ago.)
The plan was discovered in FBI raids on Scientology’s Los Angeles and Washington, D.C., offices in 1977, which yielded wiretap equipment, burglary tools and about 90,000 pages of documents. Eleven Scientology officials, including Hubbard’s third wife, Mary Sue, went to federal prison for their role in the plot, which led to a 1982 “sweep” of the church’s upper management.
5 March 2006, on 3:54 pm
Sean:
I got one for ya:
http://triablogue.blogspot.com/2006/02/inspiring-story-of-induction-into.html#comments
I didn’t call anyone names, so I don’t know if it makes good enough theater.
But it seemed to shut the thread down. Or am I just being self-congratulory?
5 March 2006, on 4:09 pm
I know about Triablogue all too well. Just to let you know that they have predetermined that they are right and everyone else is wrong on all topics and they love trolling atheist blogs and leaving absurd and overly long comments. They consider themselves omnipotent and with the only right answers to everything. Warning….they may write big long dissertations about you and how stupid and ignorant you are in your thinking if you go there. They are obviously impressed by their own assumed “intellect.” They should just declare themselves omnipotent and write praises to themselves.
5 March 2006, on 4:24 pm
How about the obvious victim, the stupid cluckin’ chicken ? She has a truly screwed up blog. Just look at the crap about her claimed “electrical energy issues” !!
Also if you want someone truly screwed consider this site – http://www.timecube.com – saying that this guy is completely crazy is a gross understatement. Believing in religion and supernatural nonsense can really screw up the mind bigtime !!
5 March 2006, on 4:55 pm
RA: Nice conclusion on that thread. I agree with everything you had to say, esp.:
Moral relativism is practiced by EVERYONE, not just theists, or atheists.
Yup. We are all guilty. I readily admit my own guilt on this. All I have are the moral compasses of love and family and friends and society. As Penn Jillette put it (and I paraphrase because I don’t wanna go listen to his NPR piece again right now), without gawd, I get to be wrong and learn something in the process.
Oh, K7? Start walking the talk. You know, “Judge not…” etc.
Yup. Yup. Yup.
And:
I will not put divinity, or ideology, above humanity.
History is rife w/examples of how this simply doesn’t work. At all.
Damn straight. Keep on preachin’.
Stardust: Didn’t know about Triablogue. To quote Lya: what a bunch of asshats.
EoR: TimeCube! That person is certifiably paranoid schizophrenic. That web site has been up forever. Thanks for the reminder. I had utterly forgotten about it.
Sean now commences to pass out the tin foil hats.
5 March 2006, on 5:56 pm
Actually, Mike, I think your beef was with me. Which is funny, because you go on to presume a lot of things about my personal theological stance because I’m posting on Hal’s blog. I believe the quote was:
“Please, please read something apart from your goddamn bible and what the local religious I-can-do-what-I-want people are peddling.”
Which, as an agnostic, I find hilarious.
5 March 2006, on 6:43 pm
“C’mon Lions; don’t be slow. Eat those Christians; go cats, go!”
- First Century Roman cheer.
5 March 2006, on 7:18 pm
I’ve spent the last couple of days reading and posting on xian blogs. Now, if you’ll exuse me I’m off for a shower and to read several chapters from Demon Haunted World to cleanse the aftertaste.
6 March 2006, on 12:05 am
I have another one to add to the Lion’s menu… Theologia Viatorum
I am so sick of this Chase guy. He trolls EVERYONE and is so annoying I would like to just…ohhhh…well …feed him to the LION.
http://chasevaughn.blogspot.com/
6 March 2006, on 7:51 am
Icarus: Come back here after you’re cleaned up and post some of what you said on the Xian blogs, please! The Lion needs feeding.
Stardust: Thanks for the tip. Theologia Viatorum is now on the menu. Stay tuned.
6 March 2006, on 5:18 pm
Theologia Viatorum is now on the menu.
yummy
6 March 2006, on 5:51 pm
Sean, stardust:
Well, truthfully, I’ve been trying to get more readers for my blog. It’s fun just having one’s friends & all, but I rather like tussling w/theists for 1 thing. & I’ve got someone from the Moral Science club dropping by. Problem w/those guys is, they have a tendency to repeat any sarcastic remarks back atcha, as if that’s a clever retort.
Once we got past the initial sturm & drang, he’s not TOO bad. A little overly sensitive, methinks. Even got him to agree about the Johannine Comma being an interpolation.
& the other fact is, I’ve been battling the negative stereotype we’ve got. Hell, I’ve even made a good friend over at the NGB (he’s a liberal methodist, so he’s pretty cool, actually).
I find it’s way too easy to fall back on the spewing venom back & forth. I know this ain’t a popular opinion, but 1 of the (dis)advantages of being a free-thinker, is to say what you think & what you feel, not what others expect you to.
Hell, we’re in the minority, we need to educate, not aggravate. & truth be told, I’ve tussled w/a few atheists as well.
But if someone does wrong, says wrong, nobody gets a free pass. That’s my motto.
For what it’s worth.
I actually had another one. Pretty interesting too. “How to get deleted at an atheist blog.”http://moralscienceclub.blogspot.com/2006/02/how-to-get-deleted.html
Short version: stepped in, made some comments, called a troll, just had a bit o’ the fun.
Note the parrot commentary at the end.
Stardust? I think I apologized for the ‘real atheist blog’ crack already, but lemmee do it again, since me poor agin’ memory tain’t as good as it were.
Sorry.
Anyways (shameless plug! sorrysorrysorry!), I’m at http://biblioblography.blogspot.com.
Come 1, come all, the more the merrier!
6 March 2006, on 7:13 pm
Thanks for throwing Moral Science Club out there, but I think the one who hangs on your blog is BF correct? He has his own blog that would make tasty lion food called Prothesis at http://protheism.blogspot.com/
He is just Jordan’s sidekick on Moral Science club. They are both pompous asses.
6 March 2006, on 9:32 pm
stardust:
Thanks for throwing Moral Science Club out there, but I think the one who hangs on your blog is BF correct?
Yeah, that’s him. Matter of fact, he posted a recent debate between us on it. Apparently he likes me. Go figure.
He may be a tad on the pompous side, but he’s a good tussle, gotta give him credit fer that. I just love a spirited debate.
10 March 2006, on 12:16 am
Hal may know chemistry, but when it comes to politics he flunked first grade.
I was just thinking something like this, only with religion. For some reason, people think that skill in one area automatically means skill in another. This guy might be really good at chem, but that fact doesn’t tell me shit about his reasoning abilities in other areas — especially like this. I’ve met way too many people in the sciences who just sucked when it came to these abstract questions (and even, at times, about the science they thought they were doing, and what it was supposed to prove).
11 October 2006, on 8:04 pm
[...] Which brings me to my point- yes, there is a point. I really started getting involved- or at least paying attention, here when Sean assembled the lions and sent us out to places like Triablogue, to maul fish. It’s become my hobby, especially lately with the so-abhorrent-it’s-gotta-be-satire-but-it-isn’t, Dani- my good buddy Frank won’t talk to me anymore. [...]